Why am I doing this?

Is there any use

Is there any point 

Yet one keeps going


Trying to form a purpose

Trying to find some use

Yet its not enough

Enough to keep going

So what do you do? 

Do you stop

 Or keep going?

You keep going

 If you like what you do.

Image credits: https://www.netimpact.org/blog/purpose-and-the-big-picture-the-how-to-guide-to-defining-your-purpose

By: Ayesha Khosla


I wrote this poem after I learnt what it was like to fail, repeatedly, yet emerge stronger from it.

Failure is a silent grave

yet the sound is so loud

that eyes follow me everywhere                     

seeing me fall in the deep black hole

but helping hands are nowhere.

Failure is as silent as a poker game

played during the cold winter.                         

Freezing my fingers but making my brain run wild.

Failure is a storm

A merciless destruction 

Finally settled

But soon forgotten

Like a fading shade in the light blue sky                 

Revealing the empty vastness of the empty sky 

unveiling the empty  world

 As if nothing ever mattered.

The horror of failure flows through my veins

erupting them when I fall in a deep hole                

the pain

the hurt

the sadness

makes me melt like snow

The feeling of void flows through my body             

The void speaks to me in a way no one speaks to me

Failure hurts too much to show

it makes me self-doubt more and more      

no matter what I do

no matter how hard I work

forcing me ask…

Am I destined to fail?

Is god experimenting on me

to see what happens if someone fails                              

To see how much sorrow lays insides my tired heart

which forces me to experience things no one else has?

Failure forces the devil inside to rise and say

its enough

I quit!

 I feel  lost and alone

Directionless and torn

depressed and ashamed                                           

lost in a black hole

with no one to go to

no one to tell

how badly I am failing

and how deep down inside the ditch

I have fallen.

Finally failed and fallen

yet there is always a rope to climb

endless craving everyday

craving to succeed everyday

doors open

doors close

doors are endless

there’s always hope

hope makes me work

it forces me to get up

and eventually making me succeed slowly and silently

silencing those who said

dreams are meaningless and dumb.

Written by: Ayesha

Image credits: https://cinemaburn.wordpress.com/2012/10/20/the-spiral-staircase/